Friday, May 11, 2007

How Much Is That Doggie. . .

Yes, anonymous, I probably should have a little dog as a role model. One thing I could really use is the ability to live in the moment. I contemplate far too much. It’s mostly happy contemplation, but mind-consuming nevertheless. And, sometimes, it’s just a “mad,” that I decide to stay on. I’ve never seen a dog do that—except for the times when Kelly doesn’t get any of my ice cream because it’s chocolate so she turns her back to me and lays on the other side of the room. And I like to think a dog doesn’t worry—but Kelly gets funny when she thinks you’re getting ready to leave and she may not be going with you. And I swear she’s thinking too much, too, when she keeps staring at you trying to figure you out or trying to tell you something and we don’t know what she’s “thinking.” But she does know how to enjoy what comes her way and run joyfully, barefoot, through the grass with the wind in her ears . She definitely follows Rule #1, "When loved ones come home, always run to greet them," and Rule #16, "When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle them gently." I guess the idea of a dog as a role model and a friend is still a good one, but maybe Kelly is a little bit “human.” And if I had a dog, I’d probably be expecting it to be like Kelly and it would just be a little dog. Hmm . . . another thing for me to think about.

The Potting Shed

I am planting my tiny lavender seedlings into larger pots today. It’s been a while since I’ve handled such little plants. The first few seedlings make me feel like all my fingers are thumbs. I’m trying not to disturb the tiny roots while setting them down into dark premoistened potting soil in which I’ve made an opening just the right size for the new plant. I try to push the fresh soil around the roots without mashing them. It gets easier after a while and I develop a comfortable rhythm. Scratch growing plants to sell from my list of possible futures. But growing for myself is definitely right there on top, clumsy as I feel. Working with fragrant plants is an instant “high.” I water them and find I have no way to make a mist fine enough to keep from toppling the little plants right over. I run water into large flats and set the pots into the flats to absorb moisture from below. I make a mental note to buy a fine sprayer. I set the flats into my cold frame and cover them with window screen to provide some shade until they adjust to the outside. I plan to leave them in the cold frame until fall, at least, to allow them to develop strong roots before I transplant them again. A cold frame appeals to my nurturing nature. Providing a shelter for tiny plants evokes the protective feeling I experienced when all my children were small and cozy inside our home, protected from the storms outside. My cold frame is on the warm south side of my garden shed. It is bordered by wild Tartarian honeysuckle on the east side. Brown thrashers and mockingbirds fly through and provide a background of activity along with robins and cardinals. A pair of bluebirds gather nest-building materials. A wren is singing its lilting little song and the cat is asleep under the garden bench. On another day he will be working to control the bird population and I’ll have to work not to be mad at him, but not this morning. The red anemones are beautiful against their background of white strawberry flowers, the snow-in-summer is blending with blue forget-me-nots, the roses are in full bud and a soft breeze stirs bell tones from my chimes hanging from a copper verdigris sun under the shed overhang. I like to think my tiny plants love the world around them as much as I do.

Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Bloom Where You Are Planted

I spent a lot of time thinking at the beauty shop yesterday between reading “Oprah” and playing with the shop’s little Jack Russell, Max. This morning I was up at 5 a.m. and I played music and thought some more. I listed my many hobbies and interests and considered what I loved and didn’t love about working and not working. I “dug” below my first layer of hobbies to find what it is that I really loved about each one that might give me some insight into my direction for the coming year. I’ve considered going back to teaching, starting a craft business or simply just living. I found the common thread is my love of those things that stimulate the senses. I love good fragrances, textures and flavors. I also love freedom and life. I decided not to give up freedom yet. It’s a good list and I’ll check back with it often. My goal for last year was to get organized and healthy. I did. We created a TV/exercise/game room in our basement where I can now dance and enjoy good movies. I set up my sewing room upstairs where all my sewing, knitting and quilting materials are at hand. There is a little sitting area there for daydreaming over magazines and photos and for curling up with a good book. I have a second kitchen in the basement for crafting and food preservation.

My goal for this coming year is “joy and adventure.” I’ll enjoy my hobbies in depth. I’ll spend a lot of time on each of them. I’ll also spend lots of time being with people I want to be with and seeing some new places. For the rest of spring I’ll plant my flowers and herbs and furnish and decorate my garden shed and porches. This summer I’ll improve my swimming, learn to sail, and spend long summer evenings by the pool and on the deck. Will I go back to work in the fall??? I’ll let that thought just float around for a while. Now I’m going out to my garden shed and get started. My lavender seedlings are ready to transplant into pots and I have crowded perennials in the garden to divide and move.

Tuesday, May 8, 2007

Dig Until You Find It

Doggie Rule #15 says, "If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it."

I’ve reached my first goal of putting together my own exercise program, my own style of eating and nourishing my spirit. I’ve lost 14 pounds. I’m finding my waist again and my balance and flexibility are noticeably improved. I’m just where I want to be—on my own custom-tailored path to real improvement of health and fitness. My blood pressure is good and going down and my energy level is good. I’m ready to get rid of my books that discuss female fatigue, walking for health, etc., etc.

I’m going to tackle the next big question. Those who don’t care for deep thoughts, look away. I’ll be “digging for what lies buried” until I find it. I’ll be exploring what I want to do for the next year . . . after I go get my hair done.